Oh, how quickly things can change.
If you had asked me two weeks ago what I would be doing late on this Tuesday afternoon, the last thing that I would have told you would be searching for a new job. I was "let go" from BambooHR a little less than a week ago.
While there were a lot of little things with perfect (or not so perfect) timing that played into this event, the ultimate problem was that I had an extremely bad bout of depression blindside me. My performance at work dropped in just a of couple weeks to less than half of what it had been previously. I could hardly get myself out of bed in the morning, let alone give 100% at work. Unfortunately, at this time, I got a new manager who had only seen poor performance from me.
I am trying not to dwell on the "what ifs" of this situation and I am definitely working on understanding my previous employer's decisions. This has been a very difficult trial; I loved my job and I saw myself working at BambooHR for years. It feels as though a lot of the plans that Preston and I had made relied on my employment at such a great company. We've looked into a few other employment options and I believe we have made a decision, but we are disappointed to say the least.
We have found much to be grateful for, though. The old saying "at least you have your health" is applicable here. We are both healthy! At least this trial is one that we can somewhat easily overcome. We are blessed to have just the two of us in our family and we are blessed that Preston is out of school so that we can both work.
I have been so thankful for all of my fantastic friends and family who have reached out to us this past week. We have felt very loved and taken care of. There are too many people to count who have helped me feel comforted and like I am not a complete loser.
In short, we are still kind of reeling from this change in our lives. We're very happy to have each other. I'm so thankful for Preston and his support. He has been my crutch the last few weeks and has loved me regardless of what demons I may be facing. I could not face each day without him by my side.
Tuesday, April 28, 2015
Thursday, April 16, 2015
When it rains, it pours.
Every once in a while, it seems like a good idea to brush of the old blog and write a new post. While only posting every six months doesn't lead to a lot of dedicated readers, it makes each post seem that much sweeter. Or it just means I am lazy.
We are winding down the school year as gracefully as possible, which means we are in a state of loosely controlled chaos with Preston studying for finals and writing what seems like a dozen ten page papers and me deciding that NOW would be a good time to get back into theater leading me to stay at the school until after 10:00 every night for the next two weeks. It is only fitting that not one, but both of our cars should break down -- on the same day -- during this time, leaving us in a metaphorical fetal position as we attempt to get from point A to point B.
Not only did I decide that I wanted to honor my theater major title for the first time in nearly two years, but I also decided that it was a good time to take on a few home improvement projects which are now laying scattered across our postage stamp sized house. The dishes are stacked precariously in the sink, on the counter and creeping slowly onto the stove top. Dinner plates from three days ago still laze about on the kitchen table which is besmirched with who even knows what. I think it is tomato based, though. Pictures frames haphazardly dot the floor, hang without pictures on the walls and even occupy a place on our love seat. They are the unfortunate aftermath of me trying to decorate. Our valiant effort of Spring cleaning stopped at the "it gets worse before it gets better" stage creating the necessity to tiptoe through the piles of old yearbooks that are hidden by the sacks of old clothing that are dwarfed by the towers of laundry that have yet to be folded and in some cases washed.
I look around the destruction that threatens to crush me and wonder how to even be an adult anymore. Like, should we just cut our losses and go back to kindergarten? Is there any hope for our poor apartment, the main causality of our recent life events?
Like I told myself when I looked at the crusty rice pot sitting to the right of my kitchen sink last night, I think we will have to let that one soak.
Besides the slow deterioration of my sanity, we have been doing really quite well. Don't let the last five paragraphs fool you. As I mentioned, I am working a show for the first time in a long time. In fact, I am typing this up while listening to headset chatter. I'm the props master for UVU's "You Can't Take It With You" and I am really enjoying it. There are quite a few cast members who I started school with and they have been so welcoming and warm towards me which has been very much appreciated. I look forward to doing this more often. I have had to familiarize myself with the theater again and I am certain some people are wondering what the heck I am doing wandering around opening random doors, but it is good to be back.
Preston's school year has been less than enjoyable, but he has powered through it admirably. He has done especially well this semester and is looking to graduate at the end of 2016. We are both excited to have an end in sight. He was inducted into BYU's Portuguese Honor Society in March. He was also called as our ward's Elder's Quorum President and has been busy with the responsibilities that come with that. He will be working through the summer, hopefully down near campus.
The last bit of news I have to share is that we are officially going to Brazil! We have been talking about going since we started dating seriously and thanks to BambooHR, we are able to go this summer over my birthday. We will be traveling through Preston's mission, staying with the members and eating lots of ice cream. Preston says that they have fantastic ice cream down there which is a huge plus for me. I am trying to learn Portuguese, but I can't roll my "r"s so we will see how that turns out.
Anyway. That's the latest from the Smiths. Even in this time of go, go, go, we are thankful to have each other and we are able to find blessings even in our small trials. For example, our second car broke down AT the repair shop just after we had dropped our first car off. We saved on towing costs! :) It's all about the silver lining.
We are winding down the school year as gracefully as possible, which means we are in a state of loosely controlled chaos with Preston studying for finals and writing what seems like a dozen ten page papers and me deciding that NOW would be a good time to get back into theater leading me to stay at the school until after 10:00 every night for the next two weeks. It is only fitting that not one, but both of our cars should break down -- on the same day -- during this time, leaving us in a metaphorical fetal position as we attempt to get from point A to point B.
Not only did I decide that I wanted to honor my theater major title for the first time in nearly two years, but I also decided that it was a good time to take on a few home improvement projects which are now laying scattered across our postage stamp sized house. The dishes are stacked precariously in the sink, on the counter and creeping slowly onto the stove top. Dinner plates from three days ago still laze about on the kitchen table which is besmirched with who even knows what. I think it is tomato based, though. Pictures frames haphazardly dot the floor, hang without pictures on the walls and even occupy a place on our love seat. They are the unfortunate aftermath of me trying to decorate. Our valiant effort of Spring cleaning stopped at the "it gets worse before it gets better" stage creating the necessity to tiptoe through the piles of old yearbooks that are hidden by the sacks of old clothing that are dwarfed by the towers of laundry that have yet to be folded and in some cases washed.
I look around the destruction that threatens to crush me and wonder how to even be an adult anymore. Like, should we just cut our losses and go back to kindergarten? Is there any hope for our poor apartment, the main causality of our recent life events?
Like I told myself when I looked at the crusty rice pot sitting to the right of my kitchen sink last night, I think we will have to let that one soak.
Besides the slow deterioration of my sanity, we have been doing really quite well. Don't let the last five paragraphs fool you. As I mentioned, I am working a show for the first time in a long time. In fact, I am typing this up while listening to headset chatter. I'm the props master for UVU's "You Can't Take It With You" and I am really enjoying it. There are quite a few cast members who I started school with and they have been so welcoming and warm towards me which has been very much appreciated. I look forward to doing this more often. I have had to familiarize myself with the theater again and I am certain some people are wondering what the heck I am doing wandering around opening random doors, but it is good to be back.
Preston's school year has been less than enjoyable, but he has powered through it admirably. He has done especially well this semester and is looking to graduate at the end of 2016. We are both excited to have an end in sight. He was inducted into BYU's Portuguese Honor Society in March. He was also called as our ward's Elder's Quorum President and has been busy with the responsibilities that come with that. He will be working through the summer, hopefully down near campus.
The last bit of news I have to share is that we are officially going to Brazil! We have been talking about going since we started dating seriously and thanks to BambooHR, we are able to go this summer over my birthday. We will be traveling through Preston's mission, staying with the members and eating lots of ice cream. Preston says that they have fantastic ice cream down there which is a huge plus for me. I am trying to learn Portuguese, but I can't roll my "r"s so we will see how that turns out.
Anyway. That's the latest from the Smiths. Even in this time of go, go, go, we are thankful to have each other and we are able to find blessings even in our small trials. For example, our second car broke down AT the repair shop just after we had dropped our first car off. We saved on towing costs! :) It's all about the silver lining.
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